Dental Laughter:
You may not consider going to the dentist something to laugh about, but that’s about to change. The next time you’re headed to have your teeth examined, calm your nerves with a little dental humor ahead of your appointment. After all, you’re paying for those pearly whites might as well show them off with a big smile. And while you’re at it, why not share these funnies? Even if your dentist’s fill-ossophy is the molar opposite of yours, she’ll still find these jokes hilarious.
- What’s the best time to go to the dentist?
Tooth-hurty. - The dentist says my teeth are like a string of pearls.
Each one has a hole through it! - Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth. But don’t worry; it’ll just take five minutes.
Patient: And how much will it cost?
Dentist: It’s $90.
Patient: $90 for just a few minutes’ work???
Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like. - Why did the two dentists get married?
Because they were so enameled of each other. - Why does a dentist seem moody?
Because he always looks down in the mouth. - What does the dentist of the year get?
A little plaque. - What did the warewolf eat after he’d had his teeth taken out?
The dentist. - A local dentist was arrested for dealing drugs.
To say I was surprised would be an understatement. I’ve been going to him for 10 years and never knew he was a dentist. - Why did the king go to the dentist?
To get his teeth crowned! - Did you hear about the dentist who planted a garden?
A month later he was picking his teeth. - What do dentists and the TSA have in common?
Cavity checks. - Dentist: Could you help me? Could you give out a few of your loudest, most painful screams?
Patient: Why? Doc, it isn’t all that bad this time.
Dentist: There are so many people in the waiting room right now, and I don’t want to miss the 4 o’clock game. - Has your tooth stopped hurting yet?
I don’t know; the dentist kept it. - Left my comb at the dentist.
Now it’s a fine-toothed comb. - What did the tooth say to the departing dentist?
Fill me in when you get back. - The dentist said that he could knock me out with gas, or he could use a big metallic rock.
I said ether/ore. - Why did the dentist make a poor date for the manicurist?
They fought tooth and nail! - Why did the Pharaoh visit the dentist?
Because Egypt his tooth…. - What game did the dentist play when she was a child? Caps and robbers.
- A man & wife entered a dentist's office. The Wife said, "I want a tooth pulled. I don't want gas or Novocain because I'm in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible." You're a brave woman said the dentist. Now, Show me which tooth it is. The wife turns to her husband and says, "Open your mouth and show the dentist which tooth it is, dear."
- An elderly patient went to have her teeth checked. "Mrs. Hopgood, your teeth are good for the next 50 years." the dentist beamed. To which she replied, "What will they do without me?"
- Young pretty Lady to her dentist: "Oh doc,Your drillings are so painful that I did rather have a baby than a filling of my cavity" . Dentist:"Well both are possible but you better tell me now which cavity you want filled, so that I can change the position of the chair"
- When a new dentist set up in a small town he quickly acquired a reputation of being the latest kind of "Painless" dentist. But a local lad quicky disputed this. "He's a fake ! " he told his mates. "He's not painless at all. When he stuck his finger in my mouth I bit him - and he yelled like anyone else.
- I am Six Inches Long and I always Kiss your lips, Feel your teeth, Feel your tongue and rolls around in your mouth SMILE! This is your friend “PEPSODENT”
- A guy goes to visit his grandmother and he brings his friends with him. While he's talking to his grandmother, his friend starts eating the peanuts on the coffee table, and finishes them off. As they're leaving, his friend says to his grandmother, "Thanks for the peanuts." She says, "Yeah, since I lost my dentures I can onlysuck the chocolate off 'em.